


Wanted

by bossbeth



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Porn With Feels, Strap-Ons, feels about the self at least
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-24
Updated: 2018-10-24
Packaged: 2019-08-06 19:31:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16393790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bossbeth/pseuds/bossbeth
Summary: Kara doesn't understand wanting like this.





	Wanted

**Author's Note:**

> Look sometimes you just want to write some filth. Based on a pretty straightforward Tumblr prompt from anon who asked for this and also not this at all, sorryyyyy

Kara feels like she should be more evolved than this.

It's crude. Primitive. There is nothing feminist about this. Nothing progressive. It's old, and base, and she hates that it speaks to her, somewhere deep inside.

Lena had soothed her, when she brought up her shame, stitched all the way through with a thread of anxiety. “You're okay, sweetheart,” Lena had reassured. “We are none of us as evolved as we might prefer in the bedroom. It's not about what we want to want. It's what your body needs.” Lena cupped her face, searching into Kara's eyes as she tried to look away, uncomfortable about talking about this so openly. Sex was something Kara knew by feel, and just discussing it, like it was okay, felt more alien than anything else. “And you don't want anything wrong, I promise. If you're scared, just ask me. I won't judge, ever. And I'll let you know if I'm not okay with it. Okay?”

Kara bit her lip, and Lena traced the curve of her chin with her thumb, the motion soothing and stirring in equal measure. “Okay.”

It wasn't that Kara was a virgin. Maybe she was a prude. Inexperienced, if she was more generous. Desire was a language she burned to speak, but when she reached for something unfamiliar - and all of this, with Lena, was unfamiliar - she felt like she spoke with all broad, flat accent, barely understood, a joke.

Lena was patience personified, and reassurance, and loving acceptance. Her face was open, always so open, when they were together, like this. Kara felt so seen. And sometimes, it was too much, to feel so raw and be so visible.

Lena never pushed. It was always at Kara's pace. Kara appreciated it, and also, somehow, just a little, hated it. Hated feeling so disconnected from this feeling for so long. Hated that she felt like a startled creature Lena was gentling along the path.

She appreciated the compassion, on a fundamental level. She was grateful for the love.

But this wasn't about love. This was need.

She wanted to touch Lena, and feel that need echoed, overriding that patient understanding, drowning out everything else but the feeling of driving connection.

//

She went to the sex shop for the first time by herself. It was a little humiliating, honestly, to go up to the stranger at the counter and explain in as clear language as she could manage what she wanted.

Lena had toys. Lots of them. Every color and shape and size and function. Kara wanted something that was part of herself. Hers. Her.

And fortunately, the attendant was very kind, and very compassionate, and very knowledgeable, and Kara was steered away from the cute briefs she had been drawn to, instead being directed to something much more utilitarian instead.

For the other part of it, well, the clerk explained that that was more personal preference. They explained some general issues, talked over price points, chatted about the right lube, and otherwise, well, “The wand chooses the wizard.”

It was exactly the dumb joke that Kara needed, in that moment. She laughed, and adjusted her glasses, and said “I think I can take it from here.” And regarded the wall of displays for a long time.

When she made it to the counter, the clerk nodded approvingly. “Attagirl. Nice choice.”

Kara smile with a bashful nod of her head and handed over her card. Maybe she could communicate clearly after all.

//

Talk to me, said Lena. Ask me, said Lena.

So Kara asked.

“Suck me,” she said.

Lena was clearly not expecting this, but from the flush of her cheeks, it was a pleasant surprise. There was nothing hesitant in the way her eyes dilated, and the sounds the made, as she took Kara in her mouth.

//

This spoke to her, somewhere deep, and in the past, something in her had resisted. She shouldn't want this.

She shouldn't want to feel the soft texture of Lena's back as it flexed under her palm, relaxing as Kara pushed her down. Shouldn't want to palm the curve of Lena's hip, fingertips catching on the strechmarks there. Shouldn't want to palm that ass, feel its give, feel this beautiful woman tremble.

She couldn't see Lena's face, just the clench of her jaw in profile. Watched her grip the sheets, hair flung over her shoulder, throat flexing as she turned.

She shouldn't want to trace the curve of the tattoos at the base of Lena's spine with the broad thumb with her right hand, her left reaching up to grip shoulder and arm and throat, feeling Lena's desperate swallow.

Collapsing like this, one arm down and braced against the bed, bicep flexing against Lena's, while her free arm came around and underneath, open kisses panting across her collar.

She shouldn't want to feel Lena respond beneath her, pushing back, gasping, falling against her folded arms, biting at herself with a whine.

But Kara wanted all these things, deep down, desperate and selfish.

And Lena gave them to her, gladly, again, and again, and again.

//

“Well,” said Lena after the first time it happened, laying on her back wrong way up the bed, still panting, “That was a very good idea.”

Kara laughed, feeling this unspeakable lightness for the first time in her life. “You think so?”

Lena reached down blindly, grasping Kara's fingertips. “You've got me desperately curious as to what else you've been thinking about.”

Kara laughed again, softer this time, lower, and sat up, retangling their legs together to better slot her hips against her girlfriend's. “I can tell you all about them.”

There was nothing in Lena's eyes but hunger. She reached up, pulling Kara's face into a kiss, mumbling into her lips, “Do tell.”

**Author's Note:**

> Ya boy over at tumblr as bossbeth


End file.
